Illness and Clarity

Image courtesy of Wikimedia Commons: Charles De Groux001

There is nothing like illness that gives you the sharpest of reality checks.  Today, I had a really difficult time breathing.  I didn't think my asthma so severe since the last time I had an attack was about a year ago.  Last week, I had the flu- coughing, runny/ stuffy nose, three days of fever, congestion and wheezing.  Well, here I am 10 days later and I still have some chills, aches but the wheezing is worse than ever.  I go to the urgicenter and then a whirlwind of activity commence when the doctor reads my SpO2 levels (94% oxygen) and hears the struggle for air in my lungs accompanied by the loud whistling when exhaling.  Four nebulizer treatments later with a strong dose of prednisone and chest x-rays, it is determined that it's not pneumonia.  Whew!  Dodge that bullet.  However, I'm still wheezing just not as bad.  I got to go home and relax.  But let me tell you, if it gets worse, I'm going to the hospital and skipping the urgicenter altogether.  I am quite frankly scared about lungs for the first time in 5 years.

New Beginnings- 2018

*dusts off the cobwebs*

It's been quite some time since I have been on this thing.  Need to get a hang of it again.  

*deep breath*

Here we go . . .

Cosmic Winter Wonderland, courtesy of NASA.

January 1st.  New year, new beginnings, right?  Well, normally I don't make any resolutions.  They often turn into broken promises that diminish my self-esteem by the end of February.  It has been a difficult three years.  I have had major changes in my career, health and financial stability.  Some of the negative items were out of my control, however, I did contribute to a portion of my anguish.  So here I am.  Baring my soul after three, no make that, four years of suffering.  My plan- to be a better version of me.

Step 1- Be kind.  I truly believe in karma.  The energy you put out in the universe will eventually return to you.  I know that I have not been the best human I could possibly be.  I plan to make amends with family, friends and people in general.  Most of all, I need to learn to be kind to myself.  I am my own worst nemesis.  It's time to stop punishing myself for all the wrongs in my life and begin to make different choices.  

Step 2- Make healthier life choices.  This applies to a number of aspects in my life from food to exercise to personal life decisions.  I plan to take a breath, think and then choose the best option for myself/ family.

Step 3- Begin the climb out of financial debt.  I'm not in real trouble yet but I can feel the constraints when it comes to my finances.  It's time to pay down the credit cards, pay off the student loans and increase my financial freedom.  I want to breathe again.  

I think that's all I can handle for 2018.  Here's to hoping that I don't fizzle out by the end of February.  :)